I finish work late on a Friday When my phone vibrates with a text from my mate He’s like “Safe, it’s the weekend, what you up to?” I replied “Not much”, “Well there’s a night that you should come to” It’s a new thing that I’ve only just discovered Where everybody goes to have fun with one another And if you’ve got a friend who wants to come then you should bring one I asked what kind of party is it and he said “A Swing one” I was like “What?” – I just could not believe it When I found out the secret life that he was leading I thought I knew this guy well, so it was quite shocking To find out now that he’s into wife swapping He said “Look here, don’t knock it til you’ve tried it Come and see it for yourself and be open minded” My first reaction was to say “Hell no!” Then I thought “Ah, I might as well give it a go…”
Coz everybody’s welcome at the Swinger’s Party You can bring a friend to the Swinger’s Party Or make new ones at the Swinger’s Party We just wanna have fun at the Swinger’s Party
It’s all love here at the Swinger’s Party You can get dressed up at the Swinger’s Party Or get messed up at the Swinger’s Party We just wanna have fun at the Swinger’s Party
I go home to have a quick shower and change That’s when I realise what kind of commitment I’ve made I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’ve been to some wild parties But never one with a big bowl full of car keys My mind starts racing, and my imagination Starts conjuring up images of sordid situations Middle aged ladies dressed in dominatrix clothes Next to overweight men rocking baby grows I try to shake the image out of my head And think “What should I wear to this kind of event?” Coz I don’t wanna come across all rude and dismissive But I also wanna make it clear that I’m off limits Eventually I settle on something that seems fitting… A parker jacket, wooly hat, scarf and some mittens I step outside and close the door to my flat Take a deep breath because now there’s no going back
I follow the directions that my mate provided But when I arrive I find something quite surprising Coz I’d expected some remote location Like a homemade dungeon in someone’s basement But it was a nightclub, illuminated By bright lights with bass pulsating through the pavement I thought “Damn, these Swinger types are brazen” But what I saw inside was even more amazing Normal looking people dancing together In pinstripes and feathers – not fishnets and leather Instead of perverts and ropey old slappers It was full of dapper looking chaps and flappers I spot the friend who invited me along Who sees my expression, and asks me the question “Is this what you expected?” and I say “Hardly…” “What did you think it would be like?” I replied “Don’t ask me”